Twisted World
by Acefirebat
Summary: An AU where all trolls are humans and ages range around young adulthood ( 21). We start off in the home of Karkat Vantis as he awaits the return of his best friend Gamzee Makara for movie night. Rated M for excessive F bombs (Thanks Karkat).
1. Chapter 1

**Authors note: I do not own homestuck or any of the characters. This is my first story, and it takes place on present day earth. All the characters are human without powers. I.E. Vriska can't control anyone; Sollux can't use telekinetics, etc. I've decided to separate the trolls ages a bit to represent their blood caste. Other than that I hope you enjoy and leave comments.

Your name is Karkat Vantis. The sun is setting along the house covered horizon, the wind is blowing softly just enough for the smells of a barbeque to be carried over the roof top where you're laying gazing deeply into the dusk sky. Your hands are intertwined cupping the back of your head and your feet are placed firmly on the slope to insure you don't slide down. You sit up holding your knees into your chest, and place your chin atop your left leg to look down at the road and your driveway below. Gamzee's car is parked on the street in front of the house, but he hasn't been seen since noon. He disappears from time to time and it's hard to keep track of him, it's hard having a roommate who is always wandering away or slacking off. You pull out your phone to check the time. You have no new messages and the movie you are supposed to start watching with him will be starting soon.

"Fuck!" You shout into the night sky fed up and frustrated knowing he will probably come home half way through the movie drunk and then proceed to pass out shortly after. You make your way to the bedroom window you climbed out of earlier to get onto the roof. Before entering your room you look around one last time for the night looking over the trees and take one last deep gaze into the sun setting in the distance. How you wish you could be anywhere but here and disappointed another night.

As you slip into your room you look around. On your desk is a picture of Gamzee and you from high school. He was a senior while you were a sophomore. You remember that day like it was yesterday, Gamzee had just given you the best news you could have imagined. He was being held back a year, which was good for you because you didn't want to be alone as a junior. He has been your best friend ever since. You place the picture back down not remembering you picked it up in the first place. You turn around and glance at the clock. The movie starts in ten minutes now. You decide it would be best to head downstairs to get ready just incase Gamzee surprises you and shows up.

"Gamzee!" you shout as you walk down the stairs .You listen for a reply, but no one responds. You raise your hands up to your head and rub your temples, and then you run both hands through your hair slightly pulling it out of frustration. You continue to walk down the stairs. When you reach the bottom you shake your head in disappointment and make your way to the kitchen to make some popcorn. As the microwave hums away heating up the popcorn you get the television turned on and set to the right channel. You push the coffee table out of the way and pull out the folding bed in the couch and drape it in blankets to relax in. You return to the kitchen to get the popcorn before the microwave starts making that beeping noise you find so irritating. You decide to skip the bowl and eat from the bag since it looks like it will be just you again tonight. On your way into the living room you shut out the lights and curl up with some blankets in the corner of the couch.

You open your eyes slightly looking into the now very bright room. Pieces of popcorn are scattered across the blanket draped bed. You swipe your thumb across the corner of your mouth and wipe away some drool. Unknowingly you fell asleep during the movie last night, however, the television is off now and you swear that you only fell asleep with one blanket, but you're covered in two or three now. That must mean only one thing that Gamzee is home. No longer feeling groggy but full of anger you jump out of bed and storm up the stairs to his room.

"Gamzee! You fuckass!" You shout furiously as you run up the stairs stepping loud enough to wake him incase he is asleep. "Gamzee! Wake up we need to fucking talk about your commitment issues!" You shout even louder as you march down the hall to his door. "Gamzee!" You yell again as you being to pound on his door. He always locks his door whenever he is asleep. You reach for the doorknob anyways to see if you can force it open, but to your surprise it's unlocked and Gamzee isn't here. The anger quickly dissipates and turns into concern. Who tucked you in? Who shut off the television? You guess that you could have been cold and in your sleep you pulled the covers up, and it is possible you set a sleep timer on the television for when the movie ended. It just doesn't feel right. You know as a fact you didn't set a sleep timer. Hell you don't even know if your television has a sleep timer, and as for the blankets you have never moved in your sleep. Sure there's a first time for everything but it is certainly not this time. You press your back to the door frame and slide down as you sigh. Where is Gamzee? Why isn't he home yet? Did he come home and leave? So many questions start running through your head and you begin to feel a headache coming on.

You shove everything to the back of your mind for contemplation later and you proceed downstairs and make some coffee. While it's brewing you clean up the living room a little, but mainly just the popcorn and straighten up the blankets a little. You didn't feel like folding away the bed yet and moving all the blankets back to the closet. When you're done you pour yourself some coffee and head back upstairs to your room. As you reach the door you instinctively try to press it open with your back like normal. When you moved into this house with Gamzee you removed the doorknob lock so you were able to push furniture though your door easily. As you grew accustomed to this feature you installed a deadbolt above the doorknob in the event you ever did want to lock yourself in. However this time your back pressed itself against the door and your hot coffee nearly spilled out of the cup and onto your shirt.

"Ahha! This is where you have been fucking hiding! Wake up fuckass and open my fucking door!" You shout into the door as you begin pounding on it. "Ugggghhh" you hear a groan from the room, but it isn't Gamzee. "Calm your tits Karkles, I'm coming." You hear a voice say. The door unlocks and pulls inwards. Terezi stands in the doorway. You can tell she just got up because she is standing there in her boy shorts and a tank top looking slightly upset that you have been shouting and stomping around for the past half hour.

**Authors note: Hey fellow readers and writes of homstuck fanfic! I just wanna take the time to thank you for reading this far! Like i said up top this is my first story ever. I have never written fanfic of any kind, but i really wanted to take a shot at it. I really enjoy writing and I hope you guys enjoy it too! Anywhoo thanks again!


	2. Chapter 2

Your name is Gamzee Makara. At least you think so. Right now you are sitting in a bar and you have no intention of leaving anytime soon, but that's mostly because you have had too much to drink and can't seem to find your car. You have been here for the better part of the night chatting it up with some of the normal patrons, but now it's getting pretty slow and the only person to talk to is this new bartender. She is really interesting to talk to, but her high pitched voice and valley girl accent really puts a damper on any desire to talk to her for more then a minute or two. She looks to be your age, but beer goggles will tend to do that to anyone. As the night goes on she begins to linger near your part of the bar. You check your phone for the time, but its dead you assume it can't be too late. Even though there is no reference of time here there is no clock on the walls and the windows have all been blacked out. The bartender walks over to you again looking a little concerned.

"Okay friend, I need to cut you off for tonight. That was the fifth time in the last hour you have checked your phone only to realize it is dead. Do you need to call someone?" she squeaks trying to be soft with her voice. She can tell that her voice hurts your ears because every time she has spoken you wince and shut your eyes tightly.

"I need to find my car and..." You trail off as you put your head down on top of your hands on the counter. Your eyes close despite your fighting it.

"Hey! Come on you can't sleep here." She raises her voice with a concerned tone then continues on a more relaxed tone "Look, my shift ends in an hour. Have some coffee or tea, but stay awake and I will take you home. Just talk to me and stay awake. Can you tell me where you live?" she is looking you in the eyes as you slowly lift your head up and prop your hands underneath your head to keep it that way.

You giggle slightly as you look at her. "I live with my motherfucken bro. We're supposed to watch a movie later tonight, and I can't find my car." Your voice varies in pitch and most of your words are slurred but she looks at you like she understands. You start laughing like you just said the funniest thing on earth though. She looks around the bar and at this point there is only one other person there besides each other. She begins to talk calmly and almost soothingly even. "Look I will be right back. Just stay here I am going to close the bar early and then I will figure out what to do with you." You just keep laughing as she walks away.

The next thing you know she is shaking you almost out of your bar stool. Looking alarmed you look up at her and try to stand right away "What's wrong? Where is the monkey? Do we need the mop yet?" You say with a sense of urgency as you look around the room almost falling over more then once. "What are you talking about?" she asks trying to keep herself from giggling and slowly transitions into a more serious tone before beginning to talk again "I need to know where you live or where I can take you. Is there someone I can call? Your brother perhaps?" You look her dead in the eye and with all seriousness you say "Yes." Then everything went black.

You wake up some time later with a horrible headache. Sunlight pours through the window and it hurts your head even with your eyes closed. You pull a thick blanket up and over your head to hide from the sunlight. It dims the light on your face quite a bit enough for you to open your eyes at least. Slowly you open your eyes only to see the sunlight shining through a pink blanket with cartoon looking squids on them. You know you are hung over but there is no way you came home last night with a pink squid blanket. Out of curiosity you slowly peak outside of your blanket shell and fight the sunlight to see. As your eyes readjust you realize you are not in your room. The window is wide open and you can see the ocean from where you're laying. Concern sets in but you still feel a little buzzed so you are not too worried.

You sit up using one hand to prop yourself up and use the other hand to rub your temple. Outside of the room you can hear dishes clinking and what sounds like water running and possibly humming. You stand up slowly and the room begins to spin and tilt slightly. Somehow you manage to run to the open window and puke on whatever is below. You don't really care what's down there but you slip back in the window and lean against the wall trying to relax yourself. The humming grows louder, but then very abruptly it stops and the door opens slightly. You hear a girl shriek in terror. That shriek really made your head hurt so much more then it needed to. But then a young woman burst into the room looking around frantically till her eyes land upon you. She places a hand over her heart and calms down with a smile and then says jokingly in a high pitched voice "I thought I lost you." She laughs and sits down beside you.

Meanwhile! You are now Karkat Vantis and you had just discovered that your friend has been asleep in your room till you woke her up just now banging and yelling on the door looking for Gamzee.

"Why the HELL, where you asleep in MY fucking bedroom?" You ask in a pretty angry tone, but in all honesty you are more shocked then anything. You would have placed bets on the person in the room being Gamzee, but this, this is really surprising and now your head is really starting to hurt.

"Um why else? You were sleeping on the couch like a sad girl without friends, and Gamzee's room is a sty. Calling it a pig sty at this point would be insulting to pigs." Terezi replies with a matter of fact tone in her voice that almost makes it sound like that logic was supposed to be entirely understood without being spoken.

"How can you even tell it's a sty?" You begin to shout with how frustrated you are becoming over this whole situation. "You are blind! Fucking BLIND! Saying that you are as blind as a bat would be an insult to the fucking bat!" You shout louder to make that insult hurt, but in reality it was just pretty stupid.

"First off you can smell his room. Even from right here you know you can smell it, the weed, the dirty clothes, the rotten food, the alcohol all of it from right here. Secondly I am pretty sure that all blind creatures are blind just the same. It just depends on how vivid your imagination is to use your senses to picture the world around you." She giggles and then smiles with an almost evil grin that stretches the length of her face. She licks your cheek and walks past you finding her way down stairs.

"Hey! I'm not done with you! You didn't even answer my question!" You shout as you follow her downstairs and into the kitchen. She sits down at the small kitchen table you have and replies simply "Can I have some coffee Karkles?" you let out a sigh and pour her a cup of coffee just the way she likes it, lots of sugar and no cream. You set it down in front of her as she giggles and then you sit across the table from her. "Now tell me what you are doing here." You demand to know. It is bugging you beyond belief at this point and you're ready to believe anything that comes out of her mouth just to get this curiosity out of your head so you can go on with your day.

"Weeellllll." she draws it out almost as if she is just trying to make this story antagonizing already. "I was at Dave's house an-" you interrupt her before she can continue "Why the FUCK where you there!"

"Shut up and I'll tell you. Gosh someone is impatient this morning" you sit there and drink some of your coffee which is now hardly even warm but you sit in frustrating agonizing silence till she continues. "You see I was at Dave's house because I got bored and pestered him till he said we could hang out. We stayed up for most of the night drawing. He let me review some of his badass raps. Then when Dirk came home unexpectedly in a worse mood then normal he said I had to leave. So I came here hoping to find something to do with you and Gamzee, but he was here you were asleep and I didn't want to walk all the way home. See? Not that interesting." Despite what you thought earlier you know there's no way that could be true. You know she likes Dave and since his brother was there the whole time you're just meant to believe that's all they did? On top of that the couch is in the same room as the front door so she would have woken you up if she came in that way besides she doesn't have a key and it was locked. Wasn't it?

"That has got to be the biggest load of shit I have heard! The biggest bull in the world couldn't take a shit that fucking big. How did you get through the front door then it was locked and I was sleeping less then ten feet from it! Secondly you hate spending time with Gamzee! Now tell me what really happened!" You shout as you stand up leaving your coffee on the table and lean against the counter waiting for her explanation.

"I never said I came in the front door. I used the open window in the hallway." She said followed by an absurdly loud laugh. Almost like she was forcing it? You don't really know, but you do begin to pick up on subtle signs that are odd to you.

"The FUCK! Why can't you knock like every other fucking person who ever visits this fucking place?" You shout louder as you try to suppress the thought of her and Dave alone together. If that thought was a brick you would win a world record for chucking a brick the furthest distance.

"Because that's boring?" she giggles and drinks the remainder of her coffee and sets the cup aside. You run both hands through your hair and feel the need to ask what happened at his house again. You hate Dave but you hate the idea of them being together even more. You have no idea what He thinks of her but you can only hope it really is just as friends.

"Alright Karkles I am going to go home after I get dressed. I have my first day of work later on you should get some of the group to come hang out for a while." She walks upstairs to get dressed you think about following her and watching her change, but you know she would probably catch you. Luckily she mentioned her new job. She just got hired on at the Juice Hut in the mall, and you have your theories about why she applied there of all places. You think it's most likely that she started working there because its Dave's favorite place to go whenever he has a chance.

You wait for Terezi to come back down after getting dressed, however after fifteen minutes or so you decide to go up and check on her. When you make it up the stairs to your room you find that the door is wide open and Terezi is no where to be found. You sigh it's not everyday you get to hang out with her and you may have just scared her away by freaking out. You didn't even get a hug goodbye, but at least you got a thank you for the coffee.


End file.
